For as long as I can remember I have only had one Big dream, One thing that I have wanted to do with my life. And that is sing. When I first started singing I wanted to be a famous pop singer then I wanted to be a country singer. But now and for last 10 years it has been my dream to sing songs that lift people up and draw them closer to God. It is a big dream of mine to travel around to different churches and sing and share my testimony of what God has done in my life.
Boy has he seen me through some difficult times and that is putting it mildly. one thing I am sure of is that God does not waste a wound. He can and will use every painful situation for good.
I am very excited that I will be recording a Cd very soon. It will be filled with a lot of songs that I have sang in church, including two that I wrote with my friend Glen. My prayer is that this Cd will bless all who hear it in some way. The songs that I am going to record are very close to my heart and have helped me through some hard times.
So after the Cd is done, what happens next? Will I be this huge overnight star? Seriously doubt it! LOL!! Will I travel around like I have dreamed of doing for years? Who knows... only God knows that. I am not sure if that is plan for my life. But one thing I do know is that He wants me to Sing! And that's what i'm gonna do. :)
Monday, October 26, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
My weight loss Journey
Seems like I am always on a diet. I am always trying different things to lose the baby weight.
But Really I have been dieting off and on since I was sixteen. When I was eighteen I went to some pretty extreme measures to lose weight. At that point I was at my highest weight of 180 pounds and very unhappy. After a painful breakup I decided I was gonna stop eating and exercise as much as possible. In fact the only things I put into my body at that time were slim fast shakes, fruits, veggies, and a popular diet pill. And when I would slip up and eat something that wasn't on my diet plan I would make my self throw up. It worked I got down to 135 lbs in just a few months. But I was doing serious damage to my body. I started having chest pains and passed out once when I was at church for a meeting. I knew at that point I had taken things to far! I stopped taking the diet pill slowly... It was hard, I believe I was addicted to them. I relied on them way to much. When I was having a rough day and feeling fat I would take up to six a day and that was NOT the recommended dose. I would like to say that I was cured over night and that I stopped making my self throw up at that point but it's not true. I continued to struggle with that part until I was 20. I am still struggling with my body image today. After having two kids but have gone through 4 pregnancies, I don't feel as secure in my skin as I did at 135 lbs. But I know for sure I don't want to go back to that prison I was in when I was eighteen. I was edgy with everyone including those closest to me. I was in constant fear of being found out. I share this today because I know there are many out there that have struggled or are struggling with an eating disorder. And I want them to know they are not alone. And that you can overcome it.
But Really I have been dieting off and on since I was sixteen. When I was eighteen I went to some pretty extreme measures to lose weight. At that point I was at my highest weight of 180 pounds and very unhappy. After a painful breakup I decided I was gonna stop eating and exercise as much as possible. In fact the only things I put into my body at that time were slim fast shakes, fruits, veggies, and a popular diet pill. And when I would slip up and eat something that wasn't on my diet plan I would make my self throw up. It worked I got down to 135 lbs in just a few months. But I was doing serious damage to my body. I started having chest pains and passed out once when I was at church for a meeting. I knew at that point I had taken things to far! I stopped taking the diet pill slowly... It was hard, I believe I was addicted to them. I relied on them way to much. When I was having a rough day and feeling fat I would take up to six a day and that was NOT the recommended dose. I would like to say that I was cured over night and that I stopped making my self throw up at that point but it's not true. I continued to struggle with that part until I was 20. I am still struggling with my body image today. After having two kids but have gone through 4 pregnancies, I don't feel as secure in my skin as I did at 135 lbs. But I know for sure I don't want to go back to that prison I was in when I was eighteen. I was edgy with everyone including those closest to me. I was in constant fear of being found out. I share this today because I know there are many out there that have struggled or are struggling with an eating disorder. And I want them to know they are not alone. And that you can overcome it.
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